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On Narcissism

Sat, 25 Jan 2025 22:01:22 GMT

Recently, I have seen the term narcissism used frequently in popular culture, social media, and other areas in the relationship and counseling ecosphere, so I thought it wise to provide additional context to help those understand the meaning of this widely used term.

The classical definition of narcissism in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (i.e., the DSM-5) is a personality disorder in which one expresses a pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and lack of empathy. A “narcissist” has an inflated sense of self-importance, is preoccupied with success, power, beauty (or other appealing superficial quality), believes she is “special,” has an inflated sense of entitlement, is envious of others, and is usually excessively arrogant.

Like with most psychological disorders, especially personality disorders, there is a spectrum of severity with which pathology exists, and narcissism is no different. In fact, every person has an element of narcissism, which is healthy to becoming a productive member of society. Without any narcissism, people would have no reason to take care of themselves or strive for any amount of monetary or personal success. So, how does one stray from the path of healthy narcissism into a more extreme or even pathological form?

The psychologist Heinz Kohut explored narcissism through the lens of one’s early childhood experiences. Children live in a world in which they often see themselves and their caregivers as all-knowing and perfect. This is why children love superheroes. All young children have what could be considered an extreme form of narcissism that can be molded depending on the environment in which they are raised. Children literally think that the world revolves around them. According to Kohut, the development of a healthy self (and healthy narcissism) requires caregivers to accomplish three critical tasks. First, the caregiver should “respond to and confirm the child’s innate sense of vigor, greatness and perfection.” Secondly, parents should be a model “to whom the child can look up and with whom he can merge as an image of calmness, infallibility, and omnipotence” (Kohut & Wolf, 1978, p. 414). Lastly, Kohut believed that parents ought to “evoke a sense of essential likeness between the child and themselves.” In other words, Kohut believed that a child running into the room with a Superman cape “needs to have his exuberance enjoyed” rather than dismissed. The extreme narcissism of a child is the key to her eventually understanding her flaws and limitations. The idea is that if a caregiver does not acknowledge and/or respond to the normative, immature kind of narcissism present in children, then the child will be left feeling as though he/she is not enough or not capable.

So, when do you know if you are truly in the presence of a “narcissist.” At the root of adult narcissism is an extremely poor and fragile self-esteem. However, a true narcissist will not present herself in this fashion. Narcissists are often extremely likeable and charming at first glance. They are charismatic, the life of the party, the ones with the “best” things, the most extravagant experiences and the coolest stories. Everything in the world of the narcissist is the greatest and most unique thing you have ever heard.

In the presence of a narcissist, you may initially feel an exuberance and admiration of your strengths. You may “vibe” together. However, this honeymoon fades as quickly as it appears. After a while, you may feel depleted and drained. You could feel pressured to love everything about the narcissist in order to keep his attention. You likely will be unable to get a word in edgewise, offer any alternative perspectives, or express your feelings. In the eyes of the narcissist, you are little more than a mirror with which to reflect a beautiful image of perfection. If that image becomes less-than-ideal, your relationship with the narcissist is threatened. Suddenly, the vibes are gone and the narcissist must find a new mirror, lest he face his flaws or imperfections. Remember that behind every narcissist is a child longing to put on his Superman cape, walk through walls, and fly faster than a speeding bullet. The person with a healthy self-image understands that she cannot fly, however retains a sliver of childhood whimsy and exuberance of the original immature narcissistic state.

References

Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders: DSM-5 . (2013). American Psychiatric Association.

Kohut, H., & Wolf, E. (1978). The disorders of the self and their treatment: An outline. International Journal of Psychoanalysis, 59, 413-425.

Mitchell, S. A., & Black, M. J. (2016). Freud and beyond: A history of modern psychoanalytic thought . Basic Books, a member of the Perseus Books Group.

Social Media Use Linked to Rising Teen Mental Health Issues, Study Reveals

Mon, 13 Jan 2025 20:39:15 GMT

In an article published in the journal Nature Reviews Psychology , researchers in Germany and the United Kingdom described the mechanisms through which social media might influence behavioral, cognitive, and neurobiological changes in adolescents, which in turn increases mental health vulnerability.

Background

Adolescence is associated with many behavioral, cognitive, and neurobiological changes that help adolescents emerge from familial dependence and establish themselves as independent individuals in society.

These developmental changes can potentially increase the vulnerability of adolescents to various mental health conditions, including anxiety, depression, obsessive-compulsive disorder, eating disorders, and mood disorders.

The use of social media has increased exponentially among adolescents in recent years. Recent estimates indicate that 95% of 15-year-olds in the UK use social media, while 50% of 13-17-year-olds in the US report being virtually constantly online.

A growing pool of evidence indicates that social media can potentially influence developmental changes in adolescents and can put them in vulnerable positions to develop various mental health disorders.

References

Journal reference:

Orben A. 2024. Mechanisms linking social media use to adolescent mental health vulnerability. Nature Reviews Psychology. https://www.nature.com/articles/s44159-024-00307-y

Behavioral mechanisms linking social media use to adolescent's mental health

The authors have focused on two behavioral mechanisms that may influence social media's impact on adolescents' mental health.

Risky posting behavior

Adolescents are often engaged in more risky behaviors than adults because of uncontrolled sensation-seeking desires and lack of self-regulation abilities. The risk-taking behavior of adolescents is known to increase their risk of developing mental disorders, including anxiety, depression, and substance abuse.

Extreme social media posts, such as alcohol intake-related posts, get more likes from the audience, which in turn triggers more risky posting behaviors of users who expect more likes from their audience.

Studies investigating the relationship between risky online and offline behaviors find a positive association between adolescents' social media use and their engagement in behaviors that might expose them to harm or risk of injury.

Adolescents mostly underrate the risks of posting revealing information on social media. Such posts can be screenshotted and shared widely to diverse audiences, which subsequently can increase their risk of experiencing cyberbullying, online harassment, and victimization.

Self-presentation and identity

Adolescence is characterized by an abundance of self-presentation activities on social media. Adolescents frequently disclose, conceal, and modify their true selves on social media to convey a desired impression to the audience.

People receive more direct and public feedback on their self-presentation on social media than in offline environments, providing them with more opportunities to shape their identity. Existing studies have found an association between increased intensity of social media use and longitudinal decline in self-concept clarity.

Social media, on the other hand, can help adolescents disclose various aspects of their identity, such as race, ethnicity, and sexuality. Emerging evidence indicates that transgender people gain positive sentiments by revealing their identity on supportive social media platforms.

Cognitive mechanisms linking social media use to adolescent's mental health

The authors have focused on four cognitive mechanisms that may influence social media's impact on adolescents' mental health.

Self-concept development

Self-concept, defined as a person's beliefs and evaluations about their qualities and traits, can be influenced by socio-emotional processes such as self-appraisal and social feedback. A negative self-concept can increase the risk of adverse mental health conditions.

The facility of personalizing content can significantly increase social media's impact on self-concept development during adolescence. Adolescents who spend more time on social media have been found to develop negative self-evaluations.

Social comparison

Self-concept development can be influenced by social comparison, particularly during adolescence. Getting personalized content on a topic of interest can influence adolescents to compare themselves with the people portrayed in this content. Furthermore, the number of likes and reactions to self-presentation posts on social media can influence users' perceptions of social ranking.

Such social comparisons, especially body image-related comparisons, can negatively impact adolescents' mental health and can increase the risk of developing socio-emotional and eating disorders.

Social feedback

A heightened desire for socialization with peers and fear of social rejection are the two prominent characteristics in an adolescent's life. Existing evidence indicates that oversensitivity to social rejections is moderately associated with depression and anxiety.

Adolescents already experiencing peer victimization have been found to develop severe depressive symptoms because of not receiving as much online social approval as peers.

Social inclusion and exclusion

Social inclusion or social acceptance online has a protective effect against emotional disorders in adolescents. In contrast, online social exclusion is associated with low self-esteem and negative emotions.

Adolescents who do not receive desired attention or feedback from social media are more prone to develop a reduced sense of belonging, meaningfulness, self-esteem, and control.

Neurobiological mechanisms linking social media use to adolescent's mental health

Overall, this comprehensive research underlines social media's multidimensional impact on teenage mental health, not just through direct contact but also by exacerbating intrinsic developmental vulnerabilities during this crucial period. While social media offers unprecedented opportunities for self-expression and social connection, it also poses unique challenges due to adolescents' heightened sensitivity towards social feedback and the complex interplay of their rapidly evolving neurobiological, cognitive, and behavioral landscapes.

Future research must delve deeper into the nuanced ways social media interacts with developmental mechanisms to safeguard adolescent well-being in the digital age better. By focusing on the specific affordances of digital platforms and their potential to influence adolescent behavior and brain development, researchers can help formulate targeted interventions that reduce harm and enhance the positive aspects of social media use. These efforts require a collaborative approach among policymakers, educators, parents, and adolescents to develop strategies that recognize digital environments' profound influence on young minds.

Finally, as we negotiate this ever-changing digital landscape, it is critical to create an atmosphere where teenagers can thrive online and offline. Understanding the mechanisms on how social media affects mental health is only the first step toward reducing risks and increasing the resilience of future generations.

By Dr. Sanchari Sinha Dutta, Ph.D., from News Medical Life Sciences

New Year, Same Doubts? Here’s How to Move Forward Anyway

Mon, 13 Jan 2025 20:05:54 GMT

Overcome impostor feelings and embrace growth with these actionable strategies.

A highly accomplished colleague recently texted me in a panic . She was about to launch a major initiative to kick off the year, complete with an announcement and event. But just before hitting "send," she froze. “I’m having a momentary freakout,” she wrote. “I need someone to talk me off the ledge.”

I smiled—not at her panic, but at how much I could relate. After all, the start of a new year often inspires bold resolutions and fresh starts, but it also tends to invite an unwelcome guest: impostor feelings.

Just a few weeks ago, I faced my own moment of doubt. My new book, Ditch the Ditty: Doing What Matters Instead of Doing It All —a labor of love coauthored with two incredible colleagues and shaped by countless late nights of writing and editing—was finally published. For a glorious five minutes, it even hit #1 as a new release in Women’s Studies on Amazon—a dream come true for any author.

And yet, I couldn’t shake the thoughts: What if people hate it? What if they think we have no idea what we're talking about?

This was the very book we wrote to help women interrupt self-doubt and impostor feelings. And here I was, embodying every word of it.

As it turns out, I’m in good company. Even Maya Angelou, an icon of talent and achievement, admitted to feeling like a fraud: “I have written 11 books,” she once said, “but each time I think, ‘Uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out.’”

Research confirms that impostor feelings are nearly universal, with 70 percent of people experiencing them at some point. So this New Year, let’s skip the pressure to eliminate self-doubt altogether. Instead, let’s focus on how to embrace it—and move forward anyway.

References

Brown, B. (2021). Atlas of the heart: mapping meaningful connection and the language of human experience. First edition. New York, Random House.

Clance, P. R., & Imes, S. A. (1978). The imposter phenomenon in high achieving women: Dynamics and therapeutic intervention. Psychotherapy: Theory, Research & Practice, 15(3), 241–247.

L. V. Anderson, Feeling like an Impostor Is Not a Syndrome, Slate (Apr. 12, 2016), https://slate.com/business/2016/04/is-impostor-syndrome-real-and-does-i…

Godwin, L., McGuigan, M., & Novotny, M. (2024). Ditch the Ditty: Doing what matters instead of doing it all. Onion River Press. https://www.ditchtheditty.com/book

It’s Not a Syndrome; It’s Being Human

The term “impostor syndrome” makes it sound like a diagnosable medical condition. It’s not. Feeling like an imposter is simply a natural reaction to stepping into something new, stretching yourself, or facing the possibility of failure.

Studies show that doubt is incredibly common, even among high achievers. And honestly? If you never feel a flicker of self-doubt, that might be the real problem. As writer L.V. Anderson (2016) humorously put it, “Maybe we should stop calling people who experience impostor syndrome ‘people who experience impostor syndrome’ and start calling people who don’t experience impostor syndrome ‘overconfident weirdos.’”

In moderation, doubt signals that you care deeply about your work. The challenge is making sure it doesn’t paralyze you.

Why We Feel Like Imposters

Impostor feelings often show up when we leave our comfort zones. It’s your brain’s way of asking, Are you sure you can handle this?—a question rooted in fear of failure, judgment, or rejection.

For women, these feelings can be amplified by societal messages that underestimate our competence, question our value, and demand perfection. Add in a culture that celebrates confidence over humility, and it’s no wonder so many of us feel like frauds.

But here’s the truth: Doubt isn’t a sign that you don’t belong. It’s a sign that you’re growing.

How to Interrupt Impostor Feelings and Step Into Your Voice

If doubt is inevitable, the goal isn’t to eliminate it. The goal is to interrupt it before it holds you back. As you tackle your New Year’s goals , try these strategies to reframe impostor feelings and move forward with confidence.

1. Name It (and Normalize It)

When impostor feelings arise, the first step is to label them. Calling them out—“This is impostor doubt”—creates distance, making them easier to manage.

Next, remind yourself that these feelings are incredibly common. Even the most accomplished people feel like frauds sometimes. Doubt isn’t proof that you’re unqualified; it’s evidence that you’re stepping into something meaningful.

Try this: When doubt creeps in, take a deep breath and say, “This is just impostor doubt. It’s normal, and it doesn’t define me.”

2. Shift Your Focus to the Work

Impostor feelings often center on how you’ll be perceived—Will people like me? Will they judge me?—rather than on the value of the work itself. Redirecting your focus to the impact you’re making can quiet self-doubt.

Ask yourself: Who will benefit from this? What problem am I solving? How can I serve others? These questions remind you that your voice matters, not because it’s perfect, but because it’s needed.

Try this: Before starting a project, write down three ways your work could positively impact others. Keep this list handy for moments when doubt resurfaces.

3. Act Anyway

One of the best ways to combat impostor feelings is to take action. Each small step builds evidence that you’re capable. Over time, this creates confidence and proves that doubt doesn’t have to control you.

Remember, confidence isn’t the absence of doubt. It’s the willingness to act despite it.

Try this: The next time doubt whispers, Stop, take one small action anyway. Press “send,” share your idea, or take the first step. Progress, not perfection, is the goal.

The Gift of Moving Forward

The New Year invites us to grow, dream, and stretch ourselves. But those ambitions often bring a sidekick: doubt. Rather than seeing it as a roadblock, what if we reframed it as a sign of progress? When we embrace our doubts, we free ourselves to step forward, imperfectly but authentically.

So, this year, when impostor feelings creep in, remember: They’re not a sign you’re failing. They’re a sign you’re trying something new, something important.

As for my colleague? She sent her big initiative email, doubts and all, reminding herself that her work—and putting herself out there—mattered.

Here’s to a New Year filled with growth, courage, and the messy, beautiful process of showing up anyway. Because the world doesn’t need perfection—it needs you.

By Lindsey Godwin, Ph.D., from Psychology Today